Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 168

This was a weird week for my 15 Minute Tweet Tales. After I posted last week, I left for a writing retreat where there was no internet. So before I took off, I selected the #15tt words for the rest of the week and scheduled them to tweet each day; however, I didn’t actually write any advance tales because I ran out of time. So I ended up writing them all today, which was interesting. I got into a groove and definitely wrote them faster than usual, but I feel like they were pretty blah. Or maybe I just used up all my creative juices during the retreat.
 
Our Sisukas critique group met at my family’s lake house, and we had a delightful time. Here we are - Kami Kinard, Rebecca Petruck, me, and Kathleen Fox doing our best at snapping a selfie:
Sisukas at Lake
 
We spent time offering feedback on rough drafts, brainstorming new ideas, talking writing and publishing in general, eating, chatting, and occasionally actually writing. We also adopted one of the neighbor dogs for the day. Buster Brown was a big, goofy ball of love that kept us smiling.
Buster Brown
 
There was even a rainbow one afternoon, so that has to be good sign for our current projects, right?
Rainbow at Lake Retreat
 
And now here are my quickly cobbled-together tales:
 
4/8 – Everyone raves about his haute cuisine, but, suspicious, she digs through the trash and finds packaging for a microwave meal. Blackmail!
 
4/9 - Wanting to make sure everyone knows he's a busy man, the boss begins all pep talks in medias res. They just think he's a crappy boss.
 
4/10 - I smirk when she trips on stage. After the hell she inflicted on us during practices, it's karma that she's the one who ruins the show.
 
4/11 - The pain her ex caused is overwhelming, and she knows the only way to achieve lex talionis is to rip his heart out. With hedge clippers.
 
15 Minute Tweet Tales4/12 – With feathers in her hair and birds perched on her shoulders, people call her the raven maven - the crows speak their truth through her.
 
4/13 - The salesman grins when one of the nouveau riche walk in the dealership: just drop some names of old-money buyers and the sale is done.
 
4/14 - Her purse is an omnium-gatherum of items she thinks are essential. She never uses most, so their only function is weighing down shoulder.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 167

15 Minute Tweet TalesI’m spending the rest of the week at a writing retreat with my critique group. There is no internet where we’re staying. I’ll either get a TON of writing done or I’ll spend the whole time curled up in a ball shaking with withdrawal. At this point I can see it going either way. Wish me luck!!
 
And now here are my 15 Minute Tweet Tales for the week:
 
4/1 - His roommate practiced same song ad nauseam. You'd think he'd improve. Wrong. You'd think that'd make it justifiable homicide. Also wrong.
 
4/2 - Ruth told friend about sweet boychik next door often stopping by to chat. But Fay knew the house was empty; family moved out after son died.
 
4/3 – Saw street vendor selling fancy purse his wife wanted but thought "caveat emptor" & left. Too bad, it was real. Stolen but real. And cheap.
 
4/4 - When ripped jeans became de rigueur at school,she took scissors to her new jeans. Her mom took a belt to her backside. Too poor for fashion.
 
4/5 - He walks in with ersatz girlfriend,and I go over to prove she'll never replace me. But we hit it off,and she dumps our BF so we can be BFFs.
 
4/6 - Mom laughs at her makeover. "You look like a fat clown. Bet you think you're a femme fatale." Using knife, she shows Mom she literally does.
 
4/7 - Schools wrecked, social networks destroyed, teen girls in catatonic states - the götterdämmerung of One Direction disbanding was epic.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 166

15 Minute Tweet TalesI’m a little late getting today’s post up because I had lunch with a friend from high school. We couldn’t remember how long it’s been since we’ve seen each other, but we think it’s been about ten years. Jessica’s in town with her family, so we all had lunch together. It was fun meeting her three daughters – they are all mini Jessicas.
 
Jessica and I had a lot of the same classes, and since her last name was Reed and mine is Rish, I spent much of the four years of high school sitting behind her. And even though *mumble mumble* years have passed, it was like nothing had changed. We chattered away at about a hundred miles a minute, just like we used to do back then to earn dirty looks from our teachers. 
 
Such a fun day! But also one of those weird ones that makes you feel both young and old at the same time. 
 
And now it’s time for some 15 Minute Tweet Tales:
 
3/25 - Mom spills red wine on my new, white tablecloth, then starts digging through herpurse. "Oy vey, Mom, your Tide stain pen won't fix that!"
 
3/26 - When traveling he gorges on complimentary breakfast at hotel & then pockets per diem. Soon he'll be able to buy a new doll for his daughter.
 
3/27 - Her date stands and pulls out her chair. It's such a rara avis that she figures he's either 'the one' or, with her a luck, a serial killer.
 
3/28 - Her mom defected while pregnant to save them both. All she had to remember her dad was a bloodstained samizdat he'd died distributing.
 
3/29 - The silent phone mocks her, and she admits her son has forgotten weekly call again. She hugs his baby picture and whispers, "Tempus fugit."
 
3/30 - Mrs. Jones bans phones in her class. Timmy shows her picture he took of her with the married principal resulting in quick volte-face.
 
3/31 - With each year of working on novel, she gets further from wunderkind she'd planned to be. Now it must be perfect. Years continue to pass.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 165

15 Minute Tweet TalesNow that Spring has officially sprung, it’s time for the onslaught of yellow pollen. Even though I knew it was an exercise in futility, I rinsed off my car over the weekend, and just two hours later, it was covered in a florescent yellow film. It’s actually kind of creepy how fast it blankets things. Makes me think of the movie The Happening. Hopefully the plants aren’t getting any nasty ideas. 
 
And now for my 15 Minute Tweet Tales for the past week:
 
3/18 - The cat struts through the house and swats the puppy on her nose. But puppy knows cat will soon regret his hubris. She's still growing.
 
3/19 - In usual seat at Oscars, she sniffles through in memoriam segment. Then sees her own face. Asks what's going on, but everyone ignores her.
 
3/20 - Her joie de vivre drives him crazy. Even when not around, her optimism scrapes his brain. He knows he'll only be happy when she's not.
 
3/21 - Date's kamikaze driving makes her yelp all the way home. She stomps inside and sinks into chair. Smiles as adrenaline sings though her.
 
3/22 - When she sees hot guy who's locum tenens while her doctor's sick, she says she has a cough, too embarrassed to tell him about hemorrhoids.
 
3/23 - Even as another wave of mal de mer hits her, she knows he's the one, since he keeps holding back her hair while stifling sympathy gags.
 
3/24 - Jema Rose is the nom de plume for his romance novels. One morning he finds a beauty at his computer writing. She smiles."Hi, I'm Jema."
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 164

I hope you’re wearing green today. If not, I’m virtually pinching you right now! I’m decked out in my St. Patrick's Day finery – solid green shirt, shamrock earrings, and socks with leprechauns and rainbows. But instead of a picture of boring ol’ me, I’m going to post one my sister sent me of her adorable pups in their shamrock socks. Happy Saint Patrick's Day!!
Shamrock Pups
And now for my latest 15 Minute Tweet Tales:
 
3/11 - The a cappella voices resonating in the hallway make him weep – not only at their beauty but at his certainty angels have come for him.
 
3/12 - He spends years training her into a bel esprit so she can mingle with his enemies and get revenge. But she falls in love with their son.
 
3/13 - His carpe diem attitude draws people to him, though they soon drift away exhausted. But he can't slow down or he'll think about her death.  
 
3/14 - After captain dies of dehydration, cruise director becomes de facto leader. First mate grumbles, but even he admits she finds resources.
 
15 Minute Tweet Tales3/15 - Any meal spent en famille was a constant barrage of jokes and laughter, covering the sad secrets no one wanted their loved ones to know.
 
3/16 - Profile says she's a feinschmecker. He's instantly smitten. He doesn't know much about food but loves women with robust vocabularies.
 
3/17 - Long-time grande dame of local theater takes a bow. Many forgotten lines indicate it's her last play. Applause is thunderous but sad.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?
 

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 163

15 Minute Tweet TalesY’all, the sun is shining and it’s warm outside! I’m sure before long I’ll be whining about how it’s too hot just like I was whining about it being too cold, but for now, I’m posting my 15 Minute Tweet Tales super fast, so I can run outside to soak up some vitamin D.
 
3/4 - Tired of handling scandals every year, the CEO orders non-alcoholic beer for company's Oktoberfest. Half act like drunken fools anyway.
 
3/5 - Heard heiress was buried with her greatest treasure, so we dug her up. Upset to find papier-mâché heart 6yo son made weeks before he died.
 
3/6 - She's a raconteur who uses words to draw people to her like magic. A magic that makes her loneliness disappear. For a moment anyway.
 
3/7 - She resents that he never stresses about the things that worry her, but when the world actually falls apart, his sang-froid saves them.
 
3/8 - He never knew how thankful he should be for car accident that gave him tabula rasa. Sanity restored, erasing memories no one should have.
 
3/9 - When he parrots her concerns verbatim but dismisses them before proceeding, she prepares a song and dance to go with her "I told you so!"
 
3/10 - Tells his dad he's taking a wanderjahr; sounds better than he's following ex around Europe hoping she'll find his persistence charming.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 162

15 Minute Tweet TalesThe past few weeks I’ve been working on a non-fiction piece for the SCBWI-Carolinas annual writing contest. I usually stay away from non-fiction because I’m pretty terrible at it. I shift into this weird, stuffy, ancient professor way of writing. Yeah, that’s totally what kids want to read. But I decided I wanted to try something completely out of the box (for me) for this contest. 
 
I picked a subject I thought had kid appeal, and I tried really hard to make the tone of the writing fun. When I got the comments back from my critique group, they said it was ‘well written and informative.’ Uh oh. I know that was code for ‘really, really boring.’ 
 
So I banged my head on my desk for a while. People usually say my fiction writing makes them laugh (in a good way… I think), so why can’t I access that funny bone when writing non-fiction? I’m not really sure, but I took another swing at the piece, pretty much rewriting everything. This time I tried to keep it chatty rather than lecture-y, and it felt much better while writing it. And the reaction from my readers was much better this time, too. I have no idea what the judge will think, but writing it was a fun challenge, and I’m glad I tried it.
 
And now on to my 15 Minute Tweet Tales, which with all the murder and cheating, I promise are very much fiction! 
 
2/25 - The hoi polloi press closer and he cringes. He should appreciate their support but is disgusted by people dumb enough to like his movies.
 
2/26 - Every creak adds to her idée fixe that husband is haunting her. But instead of confessing to cops his body is buried in cellar, she moves.
 
2/27 - Her café became trendy among the jeunesse dorée. Extra money’s nice, but she fears ending up in jail for poisoning one of the spoiled brats.
 
2/28 - Each night she watches reality TV to fit in at work kaffeeklatsch. She longs to turn it off, but making friends is part of being a spy.
 
3/1 - "This place is louche." "That's the point of a strip club." "But having PTA meeting here is weird." "Wait until principal starts to strip."
 
3/2 - "He kept saying he'd fix that loose step mañana," she sobs, as the coroner kneels beside her husband's body at the bottom of the stairs.
 
3/3 - He thought she was helping him because of noblesse oblige, but talking with him at the shelter every Saturday, she'd fallen in love.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 161

15 Minute Tweet TalesI feel like I could basically recycle last week’s post for this one. Again the South Carolina upstate is getting nice, fluffy snow, while down here on the coast we're only getting rain. This time some of it is actually freezing rain, so it seems like the weather is just taunting me now. It’s like it knows how much I want to build a snowman *cue Frozen song* and just laughs evilly before saying, “No winter frolicking for you!”
 
But I know this is a silly complaint when so many people are buried in several feet of the white stuff. I hope everyone is staying warm and staying safe!
 
And now for my 15 Minute Tweet Tales:
 
2/18 - Husband cooked spaghetti for anniversary. She bit into it with a crunch. Hoped he'd taken al dente too far. Nope, a hungry roach fell in.
 
2/19 - Sub walks in and kids start a blitzkrieg of spitballs, fart noises, etc. She flees crying two hours later. Not a record, but respectable.
 
2/20 - The principal cursed the chutzpah of students chasing away subs. Now he'd have to teach them. How he longed for the days of the paddle.
 
2/21 - He walks inside, and the déjà vu stops her breath. She doesn't know him, but she knows their love spans centuries. Now to convince him.
 
2/22 - "Saw a woman with a fish tale ergo mermaids be real," slurs sailor. Captain laughs. "Your belly's full of beer ergo you hallucinated."
 
2/23 - It's easy to smile at cheating husband when his painful death is a fait accompli. She'd poisoned his soup. Now waiting for screams to start.
 
2/24 - She's weirdly flattered when his eyes linger on her chest. Sadly he's a gonif only interested in large diamond nestled in her cleavage.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 160

15 Minute Tweet TalesFor those of you dealing with the worst of the winter weather, I hope you’re doing okay. No precipitation down this way, but it is unusually cold. I have to admit, I was hoping for an inch or two, since if it has to be this cold, I’d at least like to frolic in a bit of snow. But not too much. We southerners lose our minds when it snows since we never get to practice driving in it! But for now, it looks like it will be another snowless winter for me.
 
And now for this week’s 15 Minute Tweet Tales:
 
2/11 - She was lonely when she met him. He treated her like a queen. Pleasing him became her raison d'être. Smothered, he left. She faded away.
 
2/12 - She schleps lumpy duffel down to lobby via elevator but needs a bellhop to wrestle it into her car. She hopes he's not the curious type.
 
2/13 - The waiter hated to interrupt couple's intense tête-à-tête. Then her saw her fear and his anger. So 'accidentally' spilled tea in his lap.
 
2/14 - The battle raged on until she finally deployed her ultima ratio: "I'm the mom and I say so!" Tim sulked but ate his vegetables. For now.
 
2/15 - Walking among the flowers is verboten to people of her birth, but she thinks dancing surrounded by living colors is worth dying young.
 
2/16 - "Wunderbar, I can't wait to see you, Mom!" She arrives in a week; he has 7 days to buy house, find wife and have kid he'd told her about.
 
2/17 - Mom stares at top of son's head, sad the smartphone's clicking keys and chiming notifications are the music capturing today's zeitgeist.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?

Tweet Tales Tuesday Week 159

15 Minute Tweet TalesWell that’s weird. I just reread my tweet tales for the past week, and I have two that revolve around wedgies. I’m not sure why I have wedgies on the brain. Maybe this is a sign I should write a story for middle grade boys?? Who knows! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this week’s 15 Minute Tweet Tales:
 
2/4 - He got down on bended knee but was such a klutz he fell off pier. She jumped in to save him. Ring at bottom of the sea. She still said yes.
 
2/5 - Tim enjoyed being in The Sound of Music. Until he tried on his lederhosen. It basically gave the bully a handle to assist with wedgies.
 
2/6 - A guy bumps her, and she orders date to go mano a mano to defend her honor. The guy's muscles indicate the sex isn't hot enough for that. 
 
2/7 - If she'd known screen name was really a nom de guerre in war against stupidity, she'd have picked one more intimidating than ILoveCats31.
 
2/8 - He'd searched far and wide to fill his house with objets trouvés. But his kids lacked artistic vision and called Hoarders to help him.
 
2/9 - She laughs when told how much she'll make per annum then cries when told what she has to do. But tired of being hungry, she says yes.   
 
2/10 - Tim worked out quid pro quo with Butch: he gave him lunch money, Butch didn't give him a wedgie. Worth going hungry to safeguard crotch.
 
Play along and write tweet tales for the above words. If you’re willing to share, post them on twitter with the hashtag #15tt or add them below in the comments because I’d love to read them. Any thoughts about this week's tweet tales or #15tt words?